I have a tendency to run on feelings. I love swimming in the depths of emotion. Seeing the rise and fall of how I feel everyday helps keep me on track mentally. The awareness gives me a sense of where and how I am doing.
This is how I fell in love with Jesus. I love the supernatural peace that meets me in the chaos. I love the feeling of love and security I receive every time I read Psalm 23 (which lately is every single morning.) I love the feeling of freedom that surrounds me when I have worship music bumping through the house in the mornings before the kids wake up. But I have realized that feelings change and they always will.
Emotions are like the tides- rising and falling with any change to our environments. They are never an anchor they are only a response. We learn, we grow, we go backwards, we sprint forwards, but God is always the same. He is completely unchanging. No matter what, the same God that was with you on the mountaintop is still the same God holding you in the valley.
If I am being real, I did not buy into this for a long time. I have had too many conflicting thoughts,questions, and circumstances lodged in my mind to fully grasp what this meant. I just couldn’t get it.
I deal with some pretty intense anxiety. I compulsively pull my hair otherwise known as trichotailmania. Sometimes I don’t know I’m doing it and other times I have an awful time trying to control it…but the Bible tells us not to be anxious about anything. So where do I fall? How do I walk in truth, love, and all God has for me if I am still walking around so anxious I’m pulling my hair out?
1.) Reach Out and Get Help
I cannot stress this enough. If you are dealing with any issues related to your mental health and they are affecting your day to day life get help. I could not hear God clearly or listen to any kind of truth because I was sick. Psychiatrists and Counselors are trained to make sense of the chaos and help you sort through everything that is turning your world upside down. And if you’re like me and you’re always afraid they will think you’re crazy…they won’t. They deal with this day in and day out. They’ve seen way worse, I promise.
2.) Anchor Yourself in Truth
Put down all the books you have been reading lately and pick up the actual gospel. I have started reading through the New Testament book by book. One chapter a day, starting in Matthew, and now we’re just rolling through it. There is nothing more freeing than reading those red letters and learning how God actually feels about you.
3.) Start Where You Are
Dedicate time each day to sit with Jesus and sit with yourself. Let the feelings come and the feelings go. Release what you have been holding on to and let him show you the next steps. He is always for you and once you grasp that…begin again. Start right where you are today. Lay down the areas that are no longer serving you and give yourself some grace. The healing process is not linear and neither is your faith journey, but know this, the small steps add up. Commit to a set quiet time daily. I don’t care if it is only 5 minutes. Connect to your source of life. No matter how hectic life gets press in, because it is in those small, quiet, moments with the Lord that will give you strength. You do not have to wait for the Heavens to open up to have peace in your home today. Open your bible, girl. You’ve got this.
“So God has given both his promise and his oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary.”
Hebrews 6:18-19 NLT