What do you do with news you never wanted? How are you supposed to react when part of your heart is going away? I am not sure of any of these things. All I know is three to six months is not enough time to say goodbye. Three to six months is a nanosecond in comparison to our lives that we have shared. Surely it is not enough time to wrap your head around the person you love most not being here anymore. It hurts. All of it hurts. I have parts of my heart aching that I never knew existed. I have tears I did not know I had and they just keep coming. If they aren’t pouring down my face they are stuck in a lump at the base of my chest. They are tears well deserved.
A woman who continually made an impact throughout her entire life, beginning through the end. A true picture of perfection to all who have loved her. There could never be another like her.
My very best friend is leaving me soon. The smell of Yves St. Laurent perfume, her perfectly etched glasses, the red lipstick, trips to the beauty shop, our secret “dessert only” dinners, girl days, Nags Head daytrips, the way she loves me. All of that is leaving but part of me has to rejoice. My entire body is in mourning but my heart knows this isn’t the end. There is not an ounce of my being that does not feel the impact she has made on my life but all of me knows this is only the beginning. When I was scared, mad, and unsure of tomorrow she always held me and now as I hold on to her I remind her of what’s ahead. She always said, “ God will never put more on you than you can handle with his help” and I’d be lying if I said that felt like a lie right now. But I know she is right. Because she has always been right and she always will be right. When the Lord laid me in her arms I was given a chance to be someone. I could experience the life I was not born into and now I am able to pass that through to my own babies. To my rock, my best friend, My Meme. I love you more than anything and you will always be my everything.
Your Angel Baby
There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!